Watch: Mormon Wives' Jessi Ngatikaura Admits to Affair Amid Separation From Husband Jordan NgatikauraContent warning: This story discusses sexual assault and abuse. Jessi Ngatikaura is opening up about an extremely painful memory. During the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season three reunion special, Jessi praised costar Mikayla Matthews' journey on the show, including seeing her work through her trauma in the most recent season after sharing she had experienced sexual abuse as a child until she was 15 years old during season two. "I actually loved watching Mikayla's story because I knew that it happened to her," Jessi, 33, explained during the reunion special Dec. 4, "but seeing it play out, seeing her thoughts and feelings behind it, I can relate." Indeed, Jessi-mom to kids Jagger, 5, and Jovi, 2, with husband Jordan Ngatikaura-admitted that seeing Mikayla work through her own past hardship on Mormon Wives helped her realize one of her own. "I've been doing a lot of therapy because of mine and Jordan's situation," she continued, "I actually uncovered the memory that I was raped when I was 19."readMormon Wives' Jessi Ngatikaura Tears Up Over "Criticism" of Marriage StrugglesHowever, the reality star-who also came forward about having an affair with Vanderpump Villa's Marciano Brunette during season three-noted that uncovering the painful memory heaped on to the struggles in her own marriage. "It really started a lot of my issues, about going emotionally numb and pushing people away and feeling not good enough," Jessi explained. "And after uncovering that...me and Jordan already had our struggles, but that made them worse." Jessi found herself relating to Mikayla's struggle of intimacy with husband Jace Terry. Jessi Ngatikaura/Instagram"I know exactly how you feel," Jessi told Mikayla, who shares Beckham, 8, Haven, 5, Tommie, 3, and Lottie, 5 months, with Jace, during the reunion. "I don't want him to touch me, and it's not his fault, but it's so crazy how your body reacts. It's not just your emotions, you know?" As Jessi and Jordan continue to work through their own marriage struggles, Jessi emphasized that it was "healing" to witness Mikayla and Jace's growth. "It really hit home for me," she added. "I understand fully how that can feel." Prior to season three of Mormon Wives hitting Hulu, Jessi had confirmed to E! News that she and her husband were "back together" following her cheating scandal, but shared that getting back to normal was going to "take time." As she put it, "It's not going to something that's just amazing overnight."For free, confidential help, call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-4673 or visit rainn.org. Watch: Mormon Wives' Jessi Ngatikaura Admits to Affair Amid Separation From Husband Jordan NgatikauraContent warning: This story discusses sexual assault and abuse. Jessi Ngatikaura is opening up about an extremely painful memory. During the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season three reunion special, Jessi praised costar Mikayla Matthews' journey on the show, including seeing her work through her trauma in the most recent season after sharing she had experienced sexual abuse as a child until she was 15 years old during season two. "I actually loved watching Mikayla's story because I knew that it happened to her," Jessi, 33, explained during the reunion special Dec. 4, "but seeing it play out, seeing her thoughts and feelings behind it, I can relate." Indeed, Jessi-mom to kids Jagger, 5, and Jovi, 2, with husband Jordan Ngatikaura-admitted that seeing Mikayla work through her own past hardship on Mormon Wives helped her realize one of her own. "I've been doing a lot of therapy because of mine and Jordan's situation," she continued, "I actually uncovered the memory that I was raped when I was 19."readMormon Wives' Jessi Ngatikaura Tears Up Over "Criticism" of Marriage StrugglesHowever, the reality star-who also came forward about having an affair with Vanderpump Villa's Marciano Brunette during season three-noted that uncovering the painful memory heaped on to the struggles in her own marriage. "It really started a lot of my issues, about going emotionally numb and pushing people away and feeling not good enough," Jessi explained. "And after uncovering that...me and Jordan already had our struggles, but that made them worse." Jessi found herself relating to Mikayla's struggle of intimacy with husband Jace Terry. Jessi Ngatikaura/Instagram"I know exactly how you feel," Jessi told Mikayla, who shares Beckham, 8, Haven, 5, Tommie, 3, and Lottie, 5 months, with Jace, during the reunion. "I don't want him to touch me, and it's not his fault, but it's so crazy how your body reacts. It's not just your emotions, you know?" As Jessi and Jordan continue to work through their own marriage struggles, Jessi emphasized that it was "healing" to witness Mikayla and Jace's growth. "It really hit home for me," she added. "I understand fully how that can feel." Prior to season three of Mormon