The record executives had gathered in the back corner of an exclusive private club, sipping from crystal highball glasses, each with a large square ice cube. A bottle of 40-year-old Macallan, already two-thirds empty, sat on the table. "Artists are so difficult," the Brit complained. "They're finicky, unreliable, and refuse to believe that creativity should be something that turns on like a light switch. I mean, how hard can it be? The petite woman from Seoul in charge of most of the music market in East Asia spoke next. "It's true," she said, "And they're always whining about being mistreated. 'Streaming doesn't pay' and 'I need more money.' I never want to hear anyone on my label complain about having to post things on social media every day. I mean, how hard is it to go viral with every post?"The Sao Paulo man rubbed the bridge of his nose. "And the fans! They're so unpredictable - and ungrateful when it comes to the music we give them. Can't they just consume and shut up?" Story continues below advertisement There were a few moments of silence before the American stood up. "Ladies and gentlemen, those were the bad old days. Thanks to artificial intelligence, we are now in complete control of ALL the music." He raised his glass and everyone stood up."Congratulations, everyone! We have finally managed to take the artist out of art!" They clinked their glasses so hard that two of them cracked. More on Entertainment More videos Kim Kardashian invited to NASA launch after moon landing conspiracy claims Saskatoon celebrates Halloween 2025 with trick-or-treating, donations The Ongoing History of New Music, episode 1061: Medical mysteries of music (6) Kelsey Grammer welcomes his 8th child at age 70 Saturday Sips: Cocktails for connection this season World Series 2025: Bandwagon grows as Blue Jays inch closer to title The Morning Show: Halloween Special! Saskatoon hosts Skate Canada International for the first time since 2001 A far-fetched dystopian view of the music of the future? Or the shape of things to come? I'd vote for the latter.
If you watch the music charts, you may have noticed the debut of someone named Xania Monet on the American Billboard Radio Airplay Chart. She does not exist. She - it - became the first AI creation to chart. I quote from the press release:"The announcement follows a string of impressive accomplishments for the virtual songstress, who has quickly become one of the most talked-about names in the emerging AI music space. The historic milestone marks a defining moment for the intersection of technology and creativity, proving that digital artistry can achieve mainstream success alongside traditional talent."On social media, Xania continues to gain traction with a fast-growing following and strong engagement across platforms. Her visuals, storytelling, and evolving persona have sparked widespread discussion about the role of AI in music - not just as a tool, but as a creative collaborator. Earlier this year, Xania secured a reported $3 million deal with Hallwood Media, further establishing her as one of the most valuable and visible AI artists to date. Story continues below advertisement "Beyond her musical success, Xania's rise represents a shift in how audiences connect with creators. Her presence on the Billboard Airplay Chart challenges long-held ideas about authenticity in music, while her massive online following underscores a new kind of fan relationship - one built around curiosity, creativity, and cultural conversation." Get breaking National news For news impacting Canada and around the world, sign up for breaking news alerts delivered directly to you when they happen. Sign up for breaking National newsletter Sign Up By providing your email address, you have read and agree to Global News' Terms and Conditions and Privacy Policy. Again, Xania only exists as soulless binary code. She doesn't need food, water, or sleep. She'll never complain, get sick, or die of a drug overdose. She will do whatever she is told to do with zero pushback. And she's making money for her creators while taking attention away from real artists.
Expect more of this sort of thing. Last week, Universal Music, the world's biggest major label, announced a landmark deal with Udio, an AI company with a program that creates full songs from text prompts. Universal had launched a lawsuit against Udio, claiming that the company was scraping copyrighted material for the training of their AI models with asking for permission or paying anyone from the privilege. Now they're on the same side, revealing a joint venture where they'll launch "music creation, consumption and streaming" service sometime in 2026.
Further down in the announcement, there's this: "In addition to the compensatory legal settlement, the new license agreements for recorded music and publishing will provide further revenue opportunities for UMG artists and songwriters." Those copyright infringement charges? Dropped. Gone. Poof.
And there it is: The